So, I Want to Start a Business
Everybody else is doing it
Ever since I was a kid, I wanted to run my own show. I mean, let’s face it: jobs suck. Working for other people sucks.
So, the best way out of that crummy life is self sufficiency, right? And the best way to become self sufficient is to run your own (highly frakking successful) business.
What does starting a business involve? There certainly must be a process for it, right? Where to look? Websites. Books. Blogs.
So, I looked at some blog posts. They’re mostly strange and weird. They don’t really group sentences together very well in blog posts. It’s like they have 2 or 3 sentences, and then the writer gets sick of forming a paragraph and hits the return key early. Do these 2 or 3 sentence groups actually count as paragraphs?
You know mission statements, right? So, I’m looking at these blogs and websites about starting up your own business. Chief among them is this one, which states reasons why I should have a mission statement.
See, apparently some guy named Ted talked a bunch about how business leaders need to be able to answer questions such as “What is your purpose?” Look here, man, if I knew the answer to that, I’d be okay. I just wanna make a living without having to answer to go anywhere.
Besides, as far as philosophy goes, I’m more of a Travis Tritt “It’s a Great Day to Be Alive” kinda guy. You know how it is: you just wake up and take out the Harley, or you make a homemade soup. You don’t shave all weekend. You’re just living life, you know? I don’t typically wonder about my purpose. That just sends me into an existential crisis, and I’ve had enough of those for two, maybe even three lifetimes.
But then again, I’m on a journey, and for the sake of my new journey, I’ll go ahead and start asking these dashed questions, dash it all, so here I go.
Oh. I think I should have mentioned this at the beginning, but from now on, I’m documenting this new journey of mine on Medium, and maybe even discuss it on other of social media networks, which is going to be very strange to me because I’m an introvert. Still, I need to hold myself accountable to this journey.
Let me back up a little bit more. As you might have gathered, I’m starting a new journey; one I should have started long ago. It’s my “I’m Going to Start a Business” journey. I got the idea when I met a malicious black hat hacker (her words) at a metal bar in San Antonio. “Start that journey,” she said, “and hold yourself accountable. Post your intent and progress. Pass the peanuts.”
So, what’s my purpose? By the frakking gods,I have no idea. I mean, why are any of us here? How’d we even get here in the first place? Hell, I just wanna make some frakkin’ money so I can afford a damn Harley. Not that I’d ever ride one. I’m too neurotic to ride a motorcycle. I’d most likely run into a curb in a parking lot and fall over and damage the handlebars. I’m just no good in parking lots.
Wait, wait.
Holy crap.
I just had a thought.
If Travis Tritt already has a Harley, then he’s already done his mission statement, which means the philosophy according to that song he recorded about it being a great day to be alive isn’t exactly truthful. By the Gods! I’ve been cheated all this time, listening to that song. What the actual frak?
Angry now.
I’m just gonna sit here and stew a bit. Hang tight, y’all.
OK. So. Let’s get back to my journey now. I’ve read more of that article, and it looks like it’s not just one question I need to answer, but a whole entire unordered list of them. I mean, just look at them:
- What is my cause?
- What is my belief?
- Why does my organization exist?
- Why do I get out of bed in the morning? (Morning?!)
- Why should anyone care?
Look, I don’t have answers for these inquiries, man! And I don’t get out of bed until the sun’s directly overhead. I’ve never been a morning person anyway, and don’t go telling me I need to become one, either. I’ve always worked at night, and I’ve always liked it that way.
So, maybe I need to start a nighttime business. What businesses open at night? Bars? Casinos? Maybe I should try to start something like that.
Screw all this. I’m answering the first question from that list, which was “What’s my purpose?”
My purpose is
.
.
.
Ehh.
FUCK.
So, I had to look up the word. As it turns out, “purpose” is that place we find meaning, and has to do with what we want, and and what we contribute. I never knew life could be so involved. Godalmighty.
Oh. So, I just looked at Travis Tritt’s website. He hasn’t posted a mission statement to it. Maybe he’s keeping it a secret. Maybe he doesn’t have one.
So, back to purpose. Where do I find meaning? Lots of places.
Music. Books. Comedy. Eating out at restaurants — mainly Mexican, Indian, Mediterranean, or fried chicken with gravy.
How do I contribute to any of that? Do I open a restaurant? How do you go about opening a restaurant in the middle of a pandemic? Aren’t they all closing?
Where I live (semi-rural Texas), people don’t bother with masks and staying home, and they don’t stay six feet apart from one another when they’re out and about. They don’t give a frak about the CDC or the Rona or anything. They just go out and eat barbeque like it’s nothing, and none of the restaurants around here have closed; in fact, they’ve throven.
Grammarly just told me “throven” isn’t a word. Fuck ’em. I’m using it.
So, there. That’s it. I’ve just convinced myself I’m going to open a restaurant.
Hell, one of my first jobs was as a delivery driver at a pizza place. They ended up making me a shadow manager in the end because the owner was always stoned out of his mind and couldn’t keep track of inventory. It was a fun time, and I learned a lot from working there and listening to other managers and owners within the franchise.
I think I can do this.
So, I’ll post more about that damn list of questions later. Maybe my writing will have improved by then.
